30 Things- a conclusion

For the past 7 or so months I’ve been commenting on this list of 30 things every woman should know or have by the time she’s 30 originally published by Glamour magazine.  If you want to re-read any of the items on the list I’ve posted the list again, with each item linking back to its corresponding post. 

But before I get to that, let’s talk about what I learned from this list.  Here’s my secret…

Ya’ll,we need to start making our own lists.  I don’t disagree with everything on the list, though it comes from a women’s magazine meant to speak to millions of women so I also take all those things with a grain of salt, but things like this, accomplishments and and things we need to know by a certain age, they’ll really vary from person to person, and not all of us fit on one list.  But to spend time thinking about what we want to gain, to have, to learn in life, even if it’s not by a certain age, that’s worthwhile. And ultimately, only you can decide what’s most important for you, especially when you start looking outside of the unavoidable life skills like “learning to pay your bills” or “write thank you notes” (oy, that one should be on my list…).  For example, I don’t really think I need to own my own cordless drill like the list suggests, but I realized that one thing I would like to do before I turn 30 is change a flat tire.  I know, I KNOW!  And now I’ve put it on the internet so I’ll have to do it.  But another thing I’d like to do before I turn 30 is visit Europe again, and also buy a house with The Guns.

But until I write my own 30 list (meant just for me, not a prescription for all female adults, because I mean, who do I think I am, Oprah? just kidding, I’m pretty sure my list would be very different from O’s anyway), I’ll let you review my posts on the original list.

By 30, you should have …

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come.

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

4. A purse, a suitcase, and an umbrella you’re not ashamed to be seen carrying.

5. A youth you’re content to move beyond.

6. A past juicy enough that you’re looking forward to retelling it in your old age.

7. The realization that you are actually going to have an old age — and some money set aside to help fund it.

8. An email address, a voice mailbox, and a bank account — all of which nobody has access to but you.

9. A résumé that is not even the slightest bit padded.

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

13. The belief that you deserve it.

14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine, and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don’t get better after 30.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship, and all those other facets of life that do get better.

By 30, you should know …

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

2. How you feel about having kids.

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn’t like to happen next.

6. The names of the secretary of state, your great-grandmothers, and the best tailor in town.

7. How to live alone, even if you don’t like to.

8. Where to go — be it your best friend’s kitchen table or a yoga mat — when your soul needs soothing.

9. That you can’t change the length of your legs, the width of your hips, or the nature of your parents.

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it’s over.

11. What you would and wouldn’t do for money or love.

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs, or not flossing for very long.

13. Who you can trust, who you can’t, and why you shouldn’t take it personally.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn’t your fault.

15. Why they say life begins at 30.

What would you put on your “before 30” (or whatever age you want) list?

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