I’ve always really liked award shows. The love waxes and wanes depending on the year and how many movies I’ve seen or how many Entertainment Weeklies I’ve read. Currently I’ve read a lot of EW issues and seen a lot of movies multiple times, so I’m pretty into it this award show season.
The Guns is not as into it. Or rather, he’s not into the way that I’m into it.
We get TNT the Latin-American version most weeks so that’s how we saw the Golden Globes this year (interesting: I guess in Latin-America they don’t need to censor Ricky Gervais’ F-bombs?) and this past Sunday we watched the SAG awards.
I love the SAG awards. Somehow I feel like I know all these actors. Clearly I watch too much tv and have been watching too many movies multiple times. Or maybe it’s all that famous actor memoir reading that I’ve been doing. Really, as I’m watching it I feel like I’m watching my friends at a fancy dinner party. Or at least those schmaltzy neighbors that I ‘m always snooping on. Either way, I know them.
Are you wondering why The Guns doesn’t love this? Me too. Well, it might be because the camera will show Emma Stone in the audience and I’ll exclaim “Emma!” and maybe even wave at the tv (remember we’re going to be BFFs even though she’s way more successful than me). Or when Betty White wins Best Actress for the second year in a row and they and they cut to seriously snubbed nominee Julie Bowen as she’s exchanging words with Ty Burrell and then grabs a glass and chugs I say things like “Uh-oh. Julie needs a drink!” and then they cut to Tina Fey (another snub, who will never win, unfortunately, because she’s playing herself, but whatever she’s awesome) who is muttering and I say “Tina’s not even trying to smile…”
Or maybe it’s because when Alec Baldwin won for the SIXTH time in a row (ummm… yeah, he’s awesome but really? six time? Can’t we spread the love SAG?) they show Jon Cryer and I yell “fake smile!! fake smile!” and “you look mad in an evil way” at Ty Burrell and “awww, Eric’s heartbroken!” when they show Eric Stonestreet. And after they cut back to Alec Baldwin (who selfishly doesn’t even congratulate the nominees. Alec, you’re off my Christmas card list for that one) and don’t even bother to show Steve Carell’s response (Steve. poor poor Steve.) I decide that “They’re not even showing Steve Carell. He must really be angry.”
And I look over, and The Guns is rolling his eyes. The Guns is rolling HIS eyes at ME! (If you knew me as a teenager you know this would be like if the Karate Kid started instructing Mr. Miyagi to wax on, wax off! I’m the master of the eye roll). I can’t believe it.
So I’m a little obsessed. So I think I know these people. So I’m not completely in touch with reality (is this possible when you live on a cruise ship? maybe?). Whatever. I don’t deserve the eye roll.
Are you watching Awards Season?