Sharing Food

Growing up I ate differently than most of my family.  At least this is how I remember it.  I was always running from thing to thing, and spending a lot of nights and weekends in the dance studio meant we only had meals at home with the whole family a few times a week (not that we didn’t eat together, we just didn’t always eat together at home).  So I ate a lot of hot pockets and granola bars and fruit and easy mac and yogurt.
My family has a policy: no personal food.  That meant that no one could claim food, it was free for anyone to eat.  No crying if someone ate the last of the vanilla ice cream, we’d get some more later.  Lucky for me, most of my weekly food staples were uninteresting to the rest of my family.  That’s the benefit of having a brother 8 years younger than you… he didn’t become that teenage boy that swallows all food within a ten mile radius until I was long gone from my parents’ home. 
In college I was all about personal food.  All of my roommates agreed that it was just easier to stick to your own food.  Someone always ate a lot more or a lot less if you shared food, which meant that someone was paying more or less than they wanted.  This meant that we usually had about 4 different types of milk in the fridge… but we weren’t arguing over money.  My last roommate and I did a lot more cooking, so we had a sharing  after asking policy as well as  a policy of trading off on buying eggs, milk, and bread. 
But now I’m married.  And I have to share all my food.  Because I like a no personal food policy.  I figure if we can share money, we can share food. But, unlike the rest of my family, sometimes J and I like the same things, like cheese danishes that I pick up because they’re on sale.  But instead of having them for breakfast for 4 days, I only have it for 2 because J has the nerve to like them too.
Or we eat things at different paces.  He eats eggs like twice weekly!  And then I look in the fridge to grab one or two eggs to bake brownies… and I have no eggs!
And he eats my yogurt.  What 27-year-old man likes yogurt?
I did not put this in my wedding vows.


3 thoughts on “Sharing Food

  1. I can TOTALLY relate to this post! We eat at different paces. I can buy a box of cereal that I expect I can count on being available for the week and by Tuesday it is gone b/c he had two bowls, which happen to be half the box each. Last fall, I brought home these amazingly delicious white chocolate raspberry blondies that I immediately put in the freezer to use at an upcoming event. A couple of days before that event I mentioned that I couldn't wait to serve them only to find out he had been EATING THEM FROM THE FREEZER all week & there were no longer enough to serve! It is soooooo frustrating. So, what I've started doing for 'some' things is letting him know, “you're free to have some, but I expect there to be some for me for the rest of the week.” Or, as the case may be, these are off limits until 'this' date.

  2. It is all about setting boundaries.

    Last night, my husband asked if he could have a Girl Scout cookie because I had bought some at work. I said yes. To me, when you say a cookie, the implication is ONE cookie. This morning, I look at the box and they are all gone except for two cookies! You had better believe that I have hidden the other boxes!

    We do have a personal food policy in our house. Chuck has two kids who live here part time. Did I say kids? I meant to say Hoover vacuums. We had to implement the personal food policy because they would eat everything that I would buy and leave me nothing. I can't afford to feed his kids!

    Now I mark the things that I buy and they have learned to ask. I think that is a good thing because it has forced them to learn respect for other people's belongings, which can only help them when they have roommates!

  3. We have a “Name or Free Game” Policy.

    If you go out to eat and you have leftovers, put your name on the box. Otherwise, once it goes in the fridge, it's anyone's territory.

    Or, I'll tend to buy frozen lunches or snacks to take to work. In that case, a name goes on it.

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