When I was in high school a woman in our church made a plate of wonderful candy that my mother brought home.
I picked up an innocent looking white ball and placed it in my mouth.
It was the best thing I ever tasted.
My mom agreed, and asked the woman what they were.
And then she wrestled the recipe out of her.
Not really, she handed it over freely. Turns out these delectable candies are no bake and require only three ingredients.
So my mom makes them every year for Christmas, and sometimes on my birthday.
And also the week of my wedding, when everyone made all my favorite foods as if I was dying.
I tried to tell them that I would survive and that I would even keep my maiden name as my middle name, but they insisted on making me last meals of breakfast casserole, blackberry cobbler, and brisket.
And OREO BALLS!
So when our Bible study group decided to do a candy/cookie swap my mom got a text:
“send me the oreo ball recipe.”
She sent it to me, with instructions most people would be able to follow, but I am anal when it comes to recipes… I need it spelled out completely. So I called and asked about some portion of the mixing process, and she apologized for thinking I was a normal person who could have figured that out myself (I’m smart, but making food makes me nervous and stupid) and then explained that if I was going to soften the cream cheese in the microwave I would need to take it out of the foil wrapper.
Gee mom, I did graduate from college. Have some faith.
Anyway, it’s a wonderful candy at Christmas when we’re allowed to eat whatever, but it’s also really good anytime, because it’s so easy to make.
This is what you need.
That’s a pack of Oreos, white chocolate chips, and 8 oz of cream cheese.
You also need a food processor. I have a Magic Bullet that we got as a wedding gift and I don’t use nearly as much as those infomercials claim I should, but oreo balls need crushed cookies so I got to use it!
I’ll be honest, the bullet is not as big as most food processors, so the hardest part was crushing the cookies since I had to do it in shifts and the blade can be a little annoying. If you have a bullet, you know what I’m talking about, but this is not a product critique…
It’s a longer-than-I-meant blog post about oreo balls.
So I’ll move on.
Point is, if you’re using a bullet you’ll need to put the cookies in it in shifts and shake things up if necessary.
So let’s make oreo balls!
Put some oreos in your food processor. And when I say some, I mean a whole package. Yes. All of them, do it.
And crush them.
Crush them into a fine dust.
Then put the oreo dust (that looks like really fertile soil… except tasty) in a bowl and add your cream cheese. The cream cheese should be softened… slow way- let it sit on the counter. Fast way, for like 20 seconds in the microwave… TAKE IT OUT OF THE FOIL!
Thanks, mom. I really did need the reminder.
Mix it up!
My mom can mix it by hand, but I am weak. Plus that’s what hand mixers are for.
Then spoon some dough out into your hands and roll it into a ball. That’s right, in your hands!
It’s your call how big the balls are. They taste good no matter what.
There’s a “that’s what she said joke” in there somewhere.
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
And place them on wax paper. They don’t look very pretty, but I promise they taste good.
Then you melt the chocolate.
If you’re really cool and culinary you’ll melt the chocolate in a double boiler.
But I can’t comprehend that so I use the microwave.
My mom warned me that Ghiradelli white chips would be the best to melt via microwave, but my store didn’t have that… so I got Nestle… which worked ok.
Wait, I cannot tell a lie.
I didn’t follow the instructions EXACTLY, so my first batch of melted chocolate looked like this.
So then I figured out how to put the microwave on 50% power. 40 seconds, take it out, stir. Do that again. Do That Again… do it again until the chocolate is just melted.
Then get moving before that chocolate hardens.
How much chocolate you melt depends on your taste. I like to just drizzle a little bit on the top of the balls, but you can also melt more and dip the them into it so they’re covered.
Another option is to use dark or milk chocolate as well and dip the balls in that and then drizzle the white in a pretty design so they look like professional truffle… but me, I could eat the oreo balls with no chocolate at all, so I just put a little white on there to lighten up the richness of the ball.
Anyway, that’s how you make oreo balls.
If you make them you are required to give me a few a dozen. So I can make sure you did it right.
Remember, I’m the expert.
Minus the chocolate melting.
Have you ever had oreo balls? Got another favorite Christmas Candy?